2011-10-07

Belly

Ewelina says I complain about my age a lot these days.

I'm so old! Boo-hoo!

It's true - first time I can remember, I'm really feeling the fact that I'm not 23 anymore. I was rather too flattered (instead of being annoyed) when a teacher at MR mistook me for a student the other day (yay, she thinks I'm 19!!). I am always the oldest person at parties, often by a margin of 5 years. I usually beat the average by a full decade. They get asked for ID at the pub. My heart sinks when I don't.

I struggle to keep up with conversations about pop culture... but to be honest, I've always struggled with that.

The real kicker is that I can feel my body changing again.

Last time it changed, around the ripe old age of 27-28, my body decided to change shape and grow a bunch of muscles. I stopped being a skinny youngster and became a little bit more manly. This was a surprising, but not entirely unwelcome change.

But now I'm 35, and it's different. Now my body has decided it wants to grow a belly. A belly! I look down in the shower and discover that my normal view is ... obscured. Shock! Horror!

I really do not approve.

I find myself doubting the wisdom of having that second helping of goulash. I look around, furtively. Nobody else is having a second helping, I probably shouldn't either. Damn. Should I stop drinking coffee? Pepsi? Should I eschew all starches? Switch to the cave-man diet? Only eat grapefruit on Wednesdays?

OMG, what is wrong with me?

Oh no.

I'm getting old!

Tags: life


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